12/30/09

I'm at the movies seeing Sherlock Holmes with some friends. Scratch that--one friend plus four other people.

In other news, I think I'm depressed again and it sucks.

SOTD 12/21/09: The Earth Falls Asleep

If I was to try to write a song right now, I would be attempting to convey the same message as this one. Its called The Earth Falls Asleep by Abandon Kansas. I almost want to cry.

Can anyone tell me how,
How we learn to live with ourselves?
I've been forgiven things only God knows
But I can't forgive myself
And after all of my searching I found who I am
And it's not what I wanted
But I'm here now and I'm broken
Come save me from this hell

The earth falls asleep much too early for me
And I close my eyes but I can't rest
My body is tired, my mind is running
From the past, to the east, to the west
Trying to find the blame
That You've already taken from me

Can anyone tell me how,
How we learn to live with ourselves?
I've been forgiven things only God knows
But I can't forgive myself
And after all of my searching I found who I am
And it's not what I wanted
But I'm here now and I'm broken
Come save me from this hell

I'm convinced that the world that we see
Is a curtain behind which vast realms await us
Of uncharted marvels and oceans of mercy
Inside my Father's eyes
And the mountains are grandstands
That sheets of blue skies rest upon
Peeled back with ease by Your hands
To reveal a quarry I've never dreamed...

Can anyone tell me how,
How we learn to live with ourselves?
I've been forgiven things only God knows
But I can't forgive myself
And after all of my searching I found who I am
And it's not what I wanted
But I'm here now and I'm broken

I want to take all the things I've done
The people I've hurt
Get what I deserve
But You won't let me
No, You won't let me
My hope is in the unseen
My hope is in the unseen

My hope is in the unseen
'Cause I see no nope in me

SOTD 12/9/09: Dirty and Left Out

Song of the Day today is Dirty and Left Out by The Almost. This song is a quieter one for the band, but it is so perfect for them. As you may be able to gather from the lyrics, this song is about seeking forgiveness from God for the wrongs you've done. It serves as a confessional for Aaron Gillespie (from The Almost). He has talked about writing this song in response to the guilt that he felt from having pre-marital sex with his wife before they were married.

Now, that is probably not an area where you are struggling and I can tell you that it is not an area where I am struggling. However, the questions still remain: Why, God, do You want a relationship with me? Why do you care so much about me? I have turned my back on you so many times. Why do you still open up Your arms for me and long for me to embrace You? I am covered with dirt! I have walked away from You and rubbed dirt on myself (metaphorically, of course). Why in the world would you want to have an intimate relationship with such a person as me?

This song serves as a confessional for me as well, to ask all of those questions of God. Because really, any person who understands the weight of their sin, or even realizes that they have done 'bad things' wonders why a God so powerful would want to even look at us, let alone embrace us and love us.

The answer can be found in John 13. At the Last Supper, Jesus washes the feet of his disciples. That alone has profound implications. But in verse 6, Peter asks Jesus why he is washing their feet. In verse 8, Jesus tells Peter "If I do not was you, you have no part with me." The same applies to us. All of the dirt and muck covering us prevents us from having true, intimate relationship with Christ. He wants to draw us close to Him because He wants to wash that dirt off of us. He can't do that from standing back. Well, He probably could. But as evidenced by John 13, He chooses not to! He chooses to come close to us and wash us by hand. He works on us.

So when we tell God that we are dirty and ask Him why He wants to embrace us, we know that it is because He wants to clean us off so we can share in an intimate relationship with Him.



Hello, I swear I won't be too long
Hello, I promise I'll be real strong
Wait up, I just wanna tell you
Hold up, why are you still here?

I've been dirtier than you wanna know
I've left earlier than you'll ever know

Why do you wanna be all listening to me
Why do you spread your arms and tell me I'm free
Why do you wanna be in my life
In my life

I've been dirtier than you wanna know
I've left earlier than you'll ever know

Jesus, Jesus
There's something about your name
Master, saviour, Jesus

I've been dirtier than you wanna know
I've left earlier than you'll ever know
Jesus
Jesus

Coming Soon!

A new feature to spice up my blog! I will begin posting every day about the song that I am listening to the most or the song that means the most to me that day. It may be a little different every day. We'll see how that goes!

Also coming soon are my lists for 2009: Top 10 Albums of 2009 and Top 10 Albums, 2000-2009.